Thursday, October 6, 2011
Tartuffe, the Hypocrite
As we study the French neoclassical play, Tartuffe, we are introduced to one of Moliere's famous characters whose social flaw is that of a hypocrite. Although we have two acts to complete in the play, we can now begin to see the unfolding of the play as revealed through the characters, most of whom do not trust Tartuffe. We wonder how it is that some can be so caught up into trusting Tartuffe's trickery. Likewise, what is it that reveals his true character to others almost from the beginning? As we ponder these thoughts, let's move away from the play itself and relate the role of a hypocrite in our own lives. Think of someone you know personally (no personal names please) or someone of a celebrity status that most of us would know that could be classified by you as a "hypocrite". Instead of writing all the typical reasons of why this person might be a hypocrite in your understanding, think about how their role affects other people in your family, your friendships, or if choosing a famous figure, think of how this person's actions and words affect the larger society as a whole. How is it that this person reveals him or herself as a hypocrite? An example might be a political figure such as the North Carolina senator, John Edwards who was a candidate for the president of the USA. He promoted family values; however, he was discovered to have had an affair with another woman with whom he fathered a child - causing his wife to separate from him before she died of cancer. Another example might be that a student is teacher friendly, yet joins a group that is ready to castigate the teacher for unfair rumors/reasons). Is there ever any redemption? Can a hypocrite redeem him or herself? Approach this topic from whatever angle you wish.
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After reading the prompt, I have to say that it is a very convenient one because I find myself surrounded by many situations of hypocrisy in my life. Though everyone is hypocritical to some degree- and I won't deny that I have also been at times- some are worse than others. It was difficult for me to pick just which example I would use, I decided to use one from my personal life.
ReplyDeleteHypocrisy can be loosely defined as saying one thing but then acting in a way that contradicts one's words. I find a stunning example of hypocrisy in people who act unfaithful to a significant other. They claim that they are in love with a person and are firmly convinced that they have a promising future together, but then flirt with other people or have a physical relationship with other people whenever their boyfriend/girlfriend is unaware. What the hypocrite in this situation does not realize (or does not care about) is that they do not truly love the other person if that is the case, and their relationship probably will not last very long.
I see this sort of hypocrisy a lot, and it never fails to disgust me. It affects me on an even greater level because I lost a friend due to this. Whenever I see them behaving this way, I feel angry and hurt. I just want to shake them by their shoulders and ask them if they realize what they're doing. I want to ask them if they valued our friendship so little that they would act in this way. However, I say nothing to them. I just watch silently, which perhaps makes me a hypocrite because I find this behavior so reprehensible.
Being a hypocrite is not always unforgivable, however. There are many situations that a person has a certain viewpoint on something but then is then forced to act in a contradictory way. Though none of this condones the behavior I discussed in my previous paragraphs, sometimes one feels so pressured to follow the crowd that they say or take actions against something or someone that they are completely against. Perhaps the hypocrite acts or speaks in a way so as not to offend someone, though they disagree with it. This does not excuse hypocrisy in any way, but perhaps it gives us a bit more insight as to why the hypocrite would act the way they did.
Though forgiving someone who has deceived you is often one of the hardest things to do (and is often undeserved), I believe a hypocrite can earn redemption. They simply need to act more how they honestly feel and perhaps, if they are lucky, they will earn a small amount of respect or trust back. I know that I have acted hypocritically before and hope that people would forgive me, so I will try to do the same to them.
A person is classified as a hypocrite when they do not illustrate the moral standards or beliefs that they proclaim. Hypocrisy is found in most people at one time or another. A “real” hypocrite in my opinion is one that constantly behaves in a hypocritical sense. Unfortunately, there are oftentimes an overwhelming amount of these people. I happen to have a perfect example of this repulsive behavior in my personal life.
ReplyDeleteThis family member is not in my immediate family, however this person is a relative. He or she has been hypocritical to my immediate family for almost ten years. This person is very jealous of my family’s success and relationship. He or she pretends as if there is nothing wrong, but their actions state otherwise. This person will wave in the car and sometimes say “hi” in a neutral tone to your face, but only as a last resort. He or she will then talk poorly of my family to others.
Due to this person’s actions, family gatherings are uncomfortable. In fact, family gatherings are so uncomfortable that my family and I often do not attend. It is a very sad situation. It has truly never allowed me to have a tight bond with my extended family. Whenever I am around this person, I feel awkward, a feeling that should never be felt when around a family member. If there is a positive result that comes from this situation, it has taught me to never be filled with jealously, and to never go behind someone’s back. This hypocritical behavior has too many consequences.
I don't know who sjch94 is above so please be sure to sign your name when posting. I think you provided an accurate definition of hypocrisy and you have rightfully admitted that none of us escape its grip. I suppose, for as hard as it is to admit, we have all fallen under its influence from time to time. I'd like to think that I have outgrown this, but as soon as I claim that I am not a hypocrite, I'm afraid someone would pop up and say "Hey I remember when you....." Thus, I will avoid pushing myself into a corner. Ha ha
ReplyDeleteAnd Ryan, it is sad that your family finds it difficult to deal with one person and that it seems to control the environment of your extended family affairs. It seems that a person like this would fade into the woodwork, but often it is not that way. I think the best way to be is to keep a natural way about yourself. Smile, greet, and meet your family members, but keep a distance from the hypocrite. The scariest thing to me is in not knowing who the hypocrite is.
Samantha H says:
ReplyDeleteSorry, haha. I didn't realize it wasn't posting my name!
A hypocrite in its most indistinct definition is someone who says or does one thing, then demonstrate something totally different. When people hear the word hypocrite their minds often pull towards politicians or celebrities that have gone back on their word, but I think the most sour of hypocrites are the ones we see in our everyday lives.
ReplyDeleteI had a person in my life that I grew very close to over the course of three years. We began having a more romantic relationship, but this person always told me that he did not want a relationship. He did not desire any type of commitment from me, and not because he wanted to be with other girls. He simply did not think he was "good enough" for me, and felt that I deserved better. I found him to be a hypocrite though because when we would be together he would act as though I put the very stars in the sky, but after he left he would deny these feelings and actions entirely. He would hold my hand and kiss my cheek in pure admiration, always listened to me and helped me through everything, but after he would leave and clear his mind he would tell me that it meant nothing, that he never actually cared.
From experience, this to me is the worst kind of hypocrite. I just cannot comprehend how someone can act so loving and caring in one minute, then the next take back everything they said. I knew this person like the back of my hand, but over the course of the fourth year of knowing him he started to change entirely. He told me he would never want any type of devoted relationship with anyone, and now I find him having a steady relationship with this other girl he told me previously he wasn't the slightest bit fond for. He also told me that he would never do anything as stupid as going out and becoming drunk every weekend, but lately I find him intoxicated every Saturday night. It's as if I don't even know him anymore, he is doing everything he told me he would never do.
I find a very fine line though between someone becoming a hypocrite and someone changing. Was he telling me all these things just because he wanted my affection? Or was he honest throughout our whole relationship and something inside him just changed? I don't think I, nor anyone, can give an accurate answer to the question. Thus, I strive to not be a hypocrite -though I won't deny I probably have been in the past- and to always be honest with my feelings. Another thing I learned from this experience I learned that whether it is hypocrisy or change, you can't love someone you don't even know.
Sam,
ReplyDeleteI would have to agree with you. I find this sort of behavior that you described abominable. I've seen the way unfaithful relationships affect not only the immediate couple, but their friends and family. This sort of situation makes it awkward for the family members, but it makes it very hard for the friends in the situation too just like you describe. I think another point to be made would be how it effects certain children in the position. Divorce affecting children can have terrible and astronomical circumstances on them. It can break them down, modify their lives, change the way they look at relationships, commitment, and dependence. Faithfulness, loyalty, all of these are key points in the idea of hypocrisy. I think you proved this point very well.
Ryan,
I am also sorry to hear that this situation of hypocrisy has effected your family. I think that this is definitely an example of hypocrisy. I think it would be very difficult to approach this problem also, but I agree with Dr. Pam when she says to just greet the family and try to ignore the hypocrite. I don't think there is really any way to change the hypocrites views and actions, so just keep on living your life the way you do. I think taking the positive side of this by what you said about jealousy is a very mature outlook on the situation, and I admire that immensely.
I can not, in good conscience, write a blog about being a hypocrite without pointing out that I myself am guilty of such a thing. However, I believe that everybody is. For human beings, it is easier to point out all the faults of another person, even those we love, and ignore those in ourselves. I believe that man is naturally a preacher of good, but in many instances a follower of a darker nature. We love to view ourselves as perfect, without flaw or sin, better than the rest.
ReplyDeleteThe angle I want to take in this blog is about myself. (I apologize if this is against what you said about personal names Dr. Pam!!)
Lying has always been an issue with me, I lost a dear friend because of that (and other reasons) but predominately because I had lost myself in lies I had told. Even at home, I had issues with lies. But despite the fact that I KNEW this was a problem I had, I would yell and scream at my sister when she did so, or constantly chide my friend for his/her lies. I would not accept being lied to, but I saw my own lack of truth to be of no concern. After losing a friendship I realized I could also be on the verge of losing a love.
For nine months I have been in a relationship which, at the beginning, I litered with lies. I always felt bad for not being honest with him but often found myself refusing to tell the truth.
In the sixth month of this relationship, he told me a small lie, nothing major and certainly nothing that deserved my reaction. I was furious with him and we argued about it. Of course, I forgave him, but it was then that I realized how ridiculous it was of me to preach honesty to someone I loved so greatly, while I had been a liar for three solid months.
Miserable, I told him of every dishonest thing I said, every lie I told, and begged him for his forgiveness. He gave it to me without a second thought saying that he had known all along but that I needed to fix the problem in my own time.
I was lucky, I believe, because though I think that hypocrites should be forgiven, I do not think that they always deserve it. I think that in order to be forgiven, a hypocrite needs to acknowledge the error of their own ways and work to become a better person, to right their wrongs.
Sophie-
ReplyDeleteIn your comment to Sam you mentioned divorces. I found that to be very interesting. I had never considered that for this prompt and especially not the affect on the children. Faithfulness is extremely important and in families it is key. If you are not faithful familes are ripped apart at the seems and despite how much time goes on, some wounds never heal and they will leave a permanent scar.
Ryan-
You know how sorry I am about the family situation. As a member of a divided extended family, I know how awkward those divisions are. But good for you, for seeing a positive side! At least such a situation makes you a better person and strengthens your character.
Sam-
I strongly agree with your final paragraph. Everybody longs to be forgiven for the things that they have done and if we do don't fogive them, how can we expect them to do so for us? I am sure you have been forgiven, really I am. But also, those people who do flirt with others, maybe its just who they are. I mean, I do not believe that it is a good thing that people do such things, but that does not always mean that they don't love their boyfriend/girlfriend.
(Sam H)
ReplyDeleteRyan,
This is a very good example of hypocrisy and I am sorry that you have to deal with this person in your family. I agree with Dr. Pam's very wise advice to not let it interfere with your interactions with the rest of the family and ignore the hypocrite- as tough as it may be with times. However, I feel that the way you respond to the hypocrite is very effective. Simply saying "hi" to that person has ten times more impact than if you'd simply ignore them or go out of your way to antagonize them. It's very unfortunate a situation but you handle it with maturity. =)
Kathryn,
I have to agree with you that everyone is guilty of hypocrisy to some degree, and to condemn others without admitting our own faults would just prove it. The old saying sums it up- "People in glass houses shouldn't throw bricks." I think that writing your blog post about yourself was a very impressive thing, as it takes an enormous amount of strength to realize one's own faults and even moreso to own up to them. The good thing is that once someone is aware of their own hypocrisy- or any other fault- they can begin to correct it.
Just as a general statement, I think it's interesting to note that everyone chose to write about examples of hypocrisy in their own life rather than about a celebrity or other public figure. This just goes to show what an impact hypocrites actually make on people's lives, whether it be someone you know or yourself.
I guess I'm at the point where I see hypocrisy everywhere. Nobody is completely devoid of it. They all have some sort of aspect about them that they may not realize they have and judge others off that. But the sad fact is that there is not a single person without some hypocrisy. And I find it constantly in my life.
ReplyDeleteThere is a certain person in my life who I find particularly annoying. They fill themselves with contradictions and lies and simply refuse to stop. I find this both annoying and hard to deal with . At a certain point, I simply tried to bear with it but as time progressed I found myself incapable of such a feat.
Once, I heard a saying, "Isn't it funny how you can always ignore a person's faults but, the second you hate them, everything about them begins to annoy you?" This is how I feel. To this day, I am bothered by this person and everything they do. I am not sure if they realize it though.
Some people blame me of being oblivious to things but I get to the point where I see them missing the most apparent things. I can't stand the lies and the two-faced behavior. It has just reached the point where I ignore the aforementioned person.
Though, I do realize this may be a bit of hypocrisy on my part for not just coming out to their face and blatantly stating my distaste for them, I can't bring myself to do it. Which brings me full circle to saying that while we do find a substantial amount of hypocrisy in Tartuffe's character, everyone has it. We all experience hypocrisy and cannot get rid of it by any simple methods. It affects my life and those around me. It affects the lives of everyone. But I figure, hey, that's what makes life interesting.
Sam,
I don't believe you could have said it any better. I think there is hypocrisy in everything nowadays. And when we see it, we often wonder if the person realizes what they are doing. I know I do it. And I have issues with all the lying that goes on that is involved with it. I feel, though, that what you posted has a very firm grip on the grim reality of the subject. I applaud you and really hope we all learn from it.
Ryan,
I vaguely get what you mean with family issues and the hypocrisy related to them. I think it hurts the most when I comes from someone you know so well. The issue with families is that sometimes they are so close it is easy to get hurt or know something that will hurt. I don't approve of the way some families act but I guess that's "family hate" as I heard it once put. It's terrible but I think a lot of people have to deal with it.
Hypocrisy is an ever evolving and continuing characteristic of the human character. We all like to say one thing (because it is good and true) but go back on what we said. This happens to everyone no matter how large or small. Greed and temptation get the best of mankind and then they must resort to hypocrisy.
ReplyDeleteI feel like money drives a lot of this through people. Greed tempts us to go back on our word. As an example, professional athletes should usually be a role model to young children. Many kids and young athletes look up to them. This seems a little ridiculous when these adults get arrested, get publicly intoxicated, and demand more and more money. When we see this (or at least me) it sickens me. Our youth should not be looking up to these 'role models'. They are hypocritical to society and their general reputation. Then when the youth sees this, it all of a sudden seems right and that they can do it. Stuff like that is a never ending downward cycle. It is our job as youth to change all that and see the good and do good.
My blog (Continued)
ReplyDeleteForgiveness should be granted for them. We all make silly mistakes when we get caught up in things. These mistakes (not always of a hypocrite) can and should be forgiven. A second chance, even to these people who may have lied to us is appropriate in my opinion. We should have the chance to make right what should be right.
Kathryn,
ReplyDeleteWe all make mistakes, we all lie, and we are all hypocrites. We get caught in the spar of the moment. We lie sometimes to make a situation seem better but when in reality it can turn out to be bad. The truth is almost always the best thing to give out. Hypocrisy can and should be forgiven to all those who deserve it. It we have learned from our mistakes then we truly deserve it.
Alex,
Experiences such as that surely do life more interesting. Sometimes these people become so annoying to us that they consume our lives and such. This is not desired. I disagree with you and feel like even though they may lie and be a down right hypocrite we have to tolerate and deal with them. If this is not accomplished then their trait of being annoying with bother us and possibly that is what effect they want. Personally, I feel like you should avoid this person and just laugh (preferably to yourself) at what ridiculous things they do to annoy you. It might possibly just brighten up your day!
Sam,
ReplyDeleteI agree with your views on hypocrisy. I too can relate to your disappointment when a friend is falling into their hypocritical ways. Also I agree that we all have a little bit of hypocrisy in us.
Alex,
Good post! I also can't stand two-faced people and their hypocrisy. I hope you can get over this bothersome person that is plaguing your life.